I know y’all must be tired of me constantly talking about Smokey and I know it must seem like I only talk about men. But, that is the only thing giving me anything that is outside of the day to day routine. All I do is work, go home, go to the gym (occasionally), eat, […]Read more "“I loved him, I loved him, I loved him. And I still love him.”"
I’ve never been any good at introductions. How do I organize my many thoughts? How do I talk about the numerous feelings I have? In day to day things, I am fine. I’m not sad. I’m not numb. But, when I look at books and films like Lolita and “Hick,” I resonate too much with the […]Read more "“Silly of me to think that I could ever have you for my guy”"
They have names for girls like me: Thot Slut Tramp Fast Whore I am all of those things. All of these apply to me. I sleep with older men and a majority of them are married. They know how to make me feel like I’m special enough to give them what they want. I guess […]Read more "“Can’t go home alone again. Need someone to numb the pain.”"
Today alone, I have had three people come and talk to me about being a sugar baby. In those moments, my heart dropped. Every cell in my body was telling me to scream at them “No! Don’t! It’s not worth it! They will hurt you if they can!” But, I couldn’t because then it would […]Read more "Lessons Learned"
I’m sorry for being MIA y’all. But, so much has happened in such a short amount of time. So far: -I still haven’t gotten my biopsy results back -I’ve been feeling lonely and scared -I also had to restrain a patient and I am sure I now have a pinched nerve. So, with the patient […]Read more "It’s been a while"
(tw: blood mention, sexual history, slut shaming) So, I went to my oncology appointment yesterday. I figured it would be relatively easy to find the office but, it turns out I went to the wrong place FOUR times. I finally get to the office and fill out the forms. An adorable nurse came in to […]Read more "Colposcopy is a synonym for a deadly experience"
(TW: Sexual assault) I know I have been gone for a bit and that I have to update you all. So pretty much I have done a lot of reflecting recently. I have been in a stable mood which is pretty good. I get irritated with my mom and my sibling but, it was what […]Read more "Just another Manic Monday (I know it is Sunday)"